Powerful men have been getting in trouble for having a lack of self-control around women and for abusing their power and strength. The trials of the past few years have reminded me a little of trying to catch a particularly mischievous raccoon and finally getting him trapped with a dangling piece of aluminum – a shiny object. Leaders of our country are heavily scrutinized for their discipline in monogamy. Some of these men have gotten away with a lot of shady business before being taken down by the brave accusations of a woman who they have done wrong. As a woman, I applaud those who speak up, I know it is not an easy thing to do and the repercussions are vast. And as a woman, the shiny object itself, I am hearing a message in all of this that has my hackles up.
When I was a teenager I would sometimes wear shirts that were about two sizes too small. I would push the rules of the school dress code to show as much skin as possible. This was the early 2000s and I didn’t have any guidance from the internet so admittedly, it wasn’t always in the name of fashion and flattery that I made these choices. I was pushing on and asking questions about the rules. One of the days that I was asked to pull up my low-rise jeans and pull down my too-small shirt, I was told why. It was because this was a place of learning and my skin was a distraction to the young men who were there to learn. Just like that, I was, once again, Eve.
I do not know if the young men who were desperately trying to learn in this same place were also pulled aside and taught skills about concentration, respect and self-control but I doubt it. I believe that they absorbed a different message about how women are there to tempt them and they are weak and susceptible to the game at play. I know I have, at times, been called a moment of weakness or irresistible. The blame in those words points towards the shiny object, not the raccoon.
I would like to give men and the rules more credit. You should be able to do your homework, not cheat on tests, control your body and your language. There are a thousand ways to abuse power, especially as a leader. As we watch the leaders of our country abuse the laws and power, let us hold them accountable there. Maybe then we can take down men who believe they are above the rules without having to reduce them to Adam or the women they hurt, to Eve.